Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.Mark Twain
Today’s post comes from WordPress’s Daily Dose of Inspiration. Throughout the month WP has hosted Bloganuary Prompts. This is my first attempt, but how lucky am I to have five whole days left to participate? Today’s prompt is “What is your favorite part about yourself?” I thought long and hard to choose between all the things I like about myself. It was hard.
The Ability to Forgive Is a Great Feature of Mine
I have the ability to forgive and forget easily. People mistakenly believe I’m too easy, too sweet, or too naive. I just don’t have time for unimportant things. My husband and I can be knee deep in disagreement and the doorbell rings. He goes to the door still angry and irritated, his expression revealing it all. I, on the other hand, greet our guests with a smile. I do a decent job of compartmentalizing and/or dismissing feelings of irritation. People have to remind me why I shouldn’t like someone because of what they did to me in 1990.
With all the wonderful things in the world to focus on, why dwell on those that are unpleasant? There are some sayings or mantras I embraced early. 1. While I’m still angry the other person has forgotten all about me. 2. It takes too much of my time to remember I don’t like someone. 3. Be proactive instead of reactive.
Being angry and holding a grudge is work. Can you imagine being an angry person on social media—not liking or tweeting someone because they don’t like or tweet me? When something is good, it’s just good, and if I’m too petty to acknowledge it, I’m too petty to be on that social app.
Of course I get angry, but I make a conscious decision to get over it. I’ve served on committees with assholes. Done projects with those who didn’t carry their weight but were more than ready to share in the praise. Some of the assholes were oblivious, so what good would anger have been. My next adventures with them were more fruitful because the past had taught me how to come out a winner. Those that are assholes on purpose, I simply stay away from.
There have been times that I’ve gone on rants, but when I saw my victims again, I was sincerely contrite and expressed it. They were appreciative of a pleasant outcome and gladly reciprocated the positivity.
I know that I am blessed to have disagreeable people and/or instances roll off me like water off a duck’s back. My sister is stubborn, remembers every slight, and is one you shouldn’t go to sleep around if you’ve wronged her. My husband can recall the smallest, most inconsequential thing. So, I know mine is a rare quality. But as I said, it is chosen behavior. Practice it! You’ll be surprised at how much more relaxed you are and how much more willing you are to accept the phrase, “que sera, sera!
Every day we have plenty of opportunities to get angry, stressed or offended. But what you’re doing when you indulge these negative emotions is giving something outside yourself power over your happiness. You can choose to not let little things upset you. —Joel Osteen